There are a lot of things I don’t understand.

Women.

I could write a book about the things I don’t understand about women.  The book would be short though, because not only don’t I know much about women, I’m sure I also don’t even know what I don’t know.

Drinking cold coffee.

I don’t get it.

Coffee is meant to be drunk hot.

Or is it drank?

Also on the list of things I don’t understand are ‘Car Shows’ and the competition and the winning of prizes at car shows.

Here’s what I don’t get.  In a car show, the cars are parked.  Hoods and doors and trunks are opened for the judges to see and inspect.  The cars aren’t moving.  They didn’t go through any type of maneuvering to check out its movements.  The cars didn’t need to stop on a dime to check the brakes.  The car didn’t need to turn to check out how tight it could turn.

But even if there was a type of movement to be scored, wouldn’t that be more a test of the driver than that of the car itself?

               *Side Note 1 – you know, that’s a great idea, create a competition, maybe a race or something where people could compete as drivers to see who could race a car faster over a certain distance.  THAT would be cool.

So these parked cars are judged on certain criteria.

I went on Google and searched what these cars were judged on, and I found this:

• Exterior Quality – 15 points. What is the quality of the bodywork and paint? …
• Mechanical Quality – 15 points. Does everything look neat and well put together? …
• Suspension Quality – 15 points. …
• Cleanliness – 15 points. …
• Overall Concept And Integration – 20 points. …
• Display – 5 points.

I understand the concept and all that goes into preparing a car for this judgement.  You have this list of the criteria and you present your car to best meet this criteria.

I also understand the fascination that some might have for attending car shows.  People love cars.  It bring backs nostalgia perhaps.

But here’s what I don’t understand.

If Joe Carburetor goes to a show and wins, then why wouldn’t Joe win every car show he goes to?

Joe Carburetor wins a big show, thus, Joe had the best car presented in the best way.

Joe’s car doesn’t change.  I’m sure he meticulously cleans it the same way before every show.

Or is judging subjective?

               *Side Note 2 – you know how I feel about “judged” sports.

Now, suppose Bob Suspension and Larry Brake-Pads go to a show to try and win 1^st place, but while getting their cars ready, Joe shows up.  Perhaps the show that Joe recently won, Bob and Larry were also there.  Then why wouldn’t Bob and Larry just pack up and leave once Larry showed up.  Joe’s car was judged to be the best before, what would change.

If the car was only judged on it’s physical appearance and general attributes, then why wouldn’t Joe Carburetor’s car win every show?

Do you think Bob and Larry try to go to shows where Joe won’t go?   Perhaps Bob and Larry pick a show on a Sunday, a Sunday car show that is 500 miles away from a Saturday show that they are certain Joe will attend.

BUT – perhaps Joe goes to the Saturday show, notices the formattable duo not there, gets on Google to search for car shows and notices a car show some 500 miles away the next day.  So after the Saturday show, he loads his classic car onto his trailer and drives overnight to the Sunday show.

Ugh ….  I know how Bob and Larry feel.

There was one particular summer when I was racing pretty good.  I was coming off a good spring track season and I wasn’t working in Ocean City that particular summer so I was able to hit some road races on weekends.

It was the 80s and there were races every weekend and the same guys seemed to be at every race.  There were the same guys at every single race I went to.  Good runners: Bernie, Paul, Mike and another guy, but I don’t remember his name.

These guys were better distance runners than I was, I was mainly a miler and 800 meter runner, but when I was racing good I could hold my own with these guys, I just couldn’t beat them.

Sometimes there’d be all of them, sometimes only 1 or 2 of them, but no matter where I went, no matter how small and obscure the race, it seems one of them always showed up.  I still went to the big races and I usually won my age group, but jeez, I wanted to win the road race. 

I started looking at races that I thought they might not go to.  We were friendly and all, and we always talked about the races coming up, but I had a few I didn’t mention, as I’m sure they did.

There was this one race in Mardela.  Very small town.

The race was on a Sunday and we had raced a 10K on the day before in Snow Hill, Maryland, but I was up for a 5K race.

This was the race.  I was sure of it.  I was racing good, the 10K didn’t leave me too sore.  I registered, got my number, stretched and was on my warm up and SON OF A !!!

There was Mike at the registration table.

Mike Sterling from Crisfield, Maryland.

AW COME ON NOW.

Can’t the guy let me have just one.

The Saturday race was in Snow Hill, MD about 45 minutes from Crisfield I guess, and Mardela had to be a good hour or more.  I know Mike still lived in Crisfield – so come on.

This was a tiny race in Mardela, I don’t even think 50 runners were in it.  I think the Volunteer Fire Dept had it, it’s been a few decades now.

Mike Sterling was good.  Like, crazy good in distance.  I could take him in the 800 and pretty sure I could take him in a mile.

But a 3.1 mile?

DANG IT!!!

Mike went to Crisfield High School and back in the 1980s, they didn’t have a team.  But they got Mike a uniform and started a team with/for him.  When I was a freshman in high school Mike was either a senior or Junior, I don’t remember.  But he was good.  When we went to the State Meet in Cross Country, Mike hooked up with our bus for the ride.  Mike was in Class C, and my high school was in Class B, but they ran the races on the same day at the same venue, so he rode with us.  I’m not sure, but I think he won his State Meet Class C race.

But things were different now.  I wasn’t a high school freshman anymore.  I was pretty good now.

But back to Mardela.  It was a 5K, so we both went out kind of hard and it was just me and him a mile or so into it.  We knew each other and had a bit of exchange over the 1^st mile or so.   But after the 2 mile point, I couldn’t keep up with him.  I slacked off a bit, tried to regroup with a few surges, but it didn’t work.  Mike won and I, again, took second and won my age group.

Never won a road race in my racing ‘career’; A few 2nds, and lots of 3^rd and 4ths.  Lots of age group wins.  But never the overall winner in a road race. 

Seems there was always “That One Guy” that showed up.

I would think that Car Shows are the same.  If a car wins in a big car show, how can the same car lose in smaller shows? 

Bob and Larry – I feel you.

I’m not disparaging car shows.

Car shows aren’t my thing, but I’m not a car guy.

Car enthusiasts enjoy car shows.

But the judging ……

There are many things I don’t understand.

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