I want to apologize in advance for those that might be either grossed out or highly offended.
But….. sometimes when I’m working my mind wanders off to strange places.
*Side Note 1 – we’ve been over this
I understand evolution and I understand that we as a species have evolved.
But with all the advances, I feel like we messed up.
See, we are born with what might be a useful tool, but right after birth – *SNIP* – away it goes.
Yes, I’m speaking of the umbilical cord.
*Side Note 2 – I had to check the spelling and having never seen it in writing, I thought it started with an “A”
See, here we have this flexible cordlike structure that carries nutrients to the baby.
Yet when born, it’s cut and taken away
*Side Note 3 – when my oldest was born, her hair was so long – I had to wait to cut the cord because it was tangled in things.
You’d think with advances in sciences and biology we’d have come up with something else than just cutting it.
*Side Note 4 – since biology is a science, was that redundant?
BUT – that’s why you enjoy my blog. Not only for anecdotes and tales of my shenanigans, but also for my brainstorming ideas.
WHAT IF we kept the umbilical cord. Seriously – what if.
NOW NOW – hear me out. Think of the environment and the damage that plastic straws are doing. And think of the money we are wasting buying reusable straws.
For Goodness sake – we had a built in straw.
How cool would it be to sit at a bar, order a drink and just slip in your built-in straw?
Right?
But it doesn’t just stop at a bar. Oh no. The application and uses are limitless.
This is my wife’s favorite time of year – Chik-Fil-A has just recently released their seasonal peppermint shakes.
So milkshakes, put that on the list.
We just celebrated Thanksgiving. Traditionally you’re sitting around the table and as dinner is served, dishes are passed around and you put it on your plate and then pass it to the next person.
BUT…. Suppose instead of using a spoon to dish out some mashed potatoes, you just slip in your cord, slurp up how much you want and then pass it on to the next person. I mean seriously, you wouldn’t even need plates. You just keep passing the dishes around the table.
*Side Note 5 – BIG IDEA – food that goes around the table on a train.
So now you’ve had a good meal and there are less dishes to clean up.
And if you are in distress and you need mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, someone just grabs your cord and blows.
*Side Note 6 – okay – need to think about that one, lest someone blow up like a balloon and then fly away – that would be weird.
So I leave it to science to research this further.
I’ve done my job.
And please -DO NOT get me started on circumcisions.
My Take on Life and Events 